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What’s Your Reality…Show?

My characters tell almost all...

Alternate Reality-Pauline Baird Jones

I was watching Top Chef the other day and couldn’t help thinking, wow, it takes a lot of guts to do that, to compete like that. People who go on reality shows really put themselves out there. They get harsh criticism and have their mistakes on display for the world to see. 

It is hard enough for me to put my books out there and to get…interesting reviews (“was the author drunk when she wrote this?” Note to the reviewer, I don’t drink alcohol, just have a crazy imagination. Lol) But at least I’m not in the room staring down several judges who are telling me why they don’t like what I did. 

Anyway, because that is how my brain works (without alcohol), I got to wondering if my characters would go on a reality show, or which one they’d like to watch if they got the chance. So I asked them and here’s what they had to say about that:

Sara Donovan (The Key) “I feel like I’ve already been on Survivor—a couple of times, but I love watching American Idol and Dancing with the Stars. Dancing brings back happy memories of working out with Briggs. 

Doc (Girl Gone Nova) “If I were to admit that I watched anything it would probably be The Amazing Race. I tried Shark Tank but those guys are too nice. But you can’t put that on record. I don’t need any time traveling jerk tracking me down by what I watch on TV.”   

Olivia (Tangled in Time) “Brae has tried to explain reality television to me, but I find the concept confusing. Why do they try to suffer? I do like watching the Discovery Channel so I can learn about history and such, and I watch Top Chef in hopes of learning how to cook with modern appliances.” 

Emily (Steamrolled) “My jam is Project Runway. I keep hoping they’ll have a steampunk challenge. I also heart The Great British Baking Show. It gives me delusions of cooking competence. I tell myself I could bake that if I was better at math (those conversions!).” 

Ashe (Kicking Ashe) “I do not understand the question…[returns from time travel trip] definitely Hell’s Kitchen and Deadliest Catch. They make me feel better about my past, present, and future.”

Arian (Found Girl) “I am hoping to become a better wife to Coop by watching The Real Housewives if we ever escape the sanctuary. And I could use a cooking show, any cooking show. And perhaps a show about how to dress like an Earthling? But I do not wish to be on one! My life before was a bad reality show.”

Rachel (Lost Valyr) “I have a weakness for cooking shows. I love to glom Top Chef episodes and I’m also a fan of The Great British Baking Show, though I feel a little betrayed to learn we are getting them out of order. Logically I know that doesn’t matter, but it still bugs me. Would I be on one? No way! Facing the spider pirate was enough reality for me!” 

Nivi (Maestra Rising) blink, blink “A what?” blink, blink. “Your people do this…willingly?”

Hedy (Cosmic Boom“When I get off my current reality show, I’ll let you know.”

And a bonus round from my short stories related to my Project Enterprise world: 

Madison (Time Trap) “I’m not really into reality shows but I love classic television. From the fifties.” 

Carolina City (Operation Ark) “My reality show was my training to be a Marine, but I like to catch Dancing with the Stars when I’m not kicking alien ass.” 

So what do you think? Did any of their choices surprise you? Would you be on a reality show if you could? Do you ever watch reality TV?

Perilously yours,